Things you might want to know about us...

Having stumbled upon this blog someway or another, curiosity has gotten the better of you and you feel compelled to know a little more about us. After all, who is behind these awesomely funny and totally interesting (or so we like to think) posts? What goes on behind the scenes of this legendary blog?

It is people like you this blog loves, and I implore you to bookmark us. Because we need the love.

Jingoistic's literary team consists of two kickass writers:

Me (Jingoistic) -
Chinese and British with a pessimistic and cynical outlook on life. Constantly angry, hate the north (especially Liverpool) and loaded with sarcasm.

Most posts will be written on a whim and filled with emotion and vulgarity. Despite the title of the blog, I am unpatriotic, like commenting on shallow politics and mocking Britain. Expect quite a few posts concerning China (and a lot of text in brackets).

Having lives in Liverpool for years, life goals are to get the hell out of Liverpool, see Liverpool Football Club win the Treble and pursue a career in Medicine. The rest of my life is exceptionally uninteresting.

Torquer -
A profound writer born in the slums of Manchester. Witty, satirical, debonair; all qualities we make do without. However, his writing style is much more thought-out and methodical than mine (not hard) which makes it perfectly suited to satire. He also takes much pleasure in constantly critisising his grammar.

If you thought my life was boring, his is unbearably worse. Interests include: Rallying support for Macs, organising his stationary meticulously and feeding his cat Hugo.

Since he's an incredibly lazy bastard don't expect more than a post a month. As a guest writer he doesn't really pull his weight around the place which makes me wonder sometimes why I ever pay him (oh wait... I don't).

OUR MISSION
What is the purpose of this blog? Why does this blog read like a poorly written humour magazine? Why do we act like our heads are stuck up our own arses?

All very reasonable questions to ask.

When I started this blog it was created for the purpose of venting my hatred for the injustice we face everyday. Somewhere to rant and rave without drawing odd looks. From there is progressed to the point where we realised we had the potential to make this blog great, which is exactly what we're trying to achieve at the moment.

Sure, this blog may have been created on a whim and an idle fancy but I really do believe I can reach out to a wider audience and entertain the masses. Call it ambitious, a silly notion but it can be achieved.

If we don't we won't lose sleep over it.

So if you feel sympathetic towards our cause or like what you read then bookmark or blogroll us. Help us on the long windy road to success.

RECENTLY
I found a massive flaw in this page; everything is subject to change. It's been a while since I wrote this post and things have certainly changed.

I now write for notfunny.ca, a Canadian humour website (Canadians? Humour? An oxymoron surely?). It's a start and I'm now one step closer to that elusive job as The Times Editor. These things take time.

I started this blog to post about my loser life and things of interest. Unfortunately, things of interest have taken over and I haven't written anything about my life really. I now seem to post mainly on current affairs (with a twist of controversial commentary) which seems to please the masses. Hopefully it'll stay that way.

The Secret to Success at GCSE English

What an English lesson! I didn't even care that I had to watch the shitty 1996 version of Romeo and Juliet with that git Leonardo Di Capprio in it. I didn't even care when I mis-pronounced melancholy so that it sounded like an italian pasta.

The fact is, I got an A*. For my first draft. Only me and Robin managed such a feat. Life is now perfect... for the day anyway.

The Essay was on Frankenstein and is now adorned with pleasing comments down the margins like: "fantastic!" and "very good point". I might keep the crumpled essay as a trophy of accomplishment so that in later life, I can tell everyone how kickass at english I was.

But the thing that irritates me the most is that I completely bullshitted through it. The result completely undermines my opinion of english analysis because I was just taking the piss at times. I don't think there's a chance in hell that Mary Shelley meant half the stuff I wrote about.

As if Victor suffered Post-Natal Depression. As if Teen Pregnancy relates to Frankenstein.

But to be honest, I couldn't care less because I now have an A*. And I've discovered the secret to success at English:

No matter how irrelevant the point, how absurd the opinion, how ridiculous the links. Write it and back it up. This is what we call "original interpretations". Teachers dig that shit and give A*s for that kind of radical thinking.